Lesson #78
Don't assume the worst
I am definitely my kids' biggest fan. I like to cheer them on and take the approach of "catch them doing good." It can be so easy tp harp on all of the things they are doing wrong throughout the day because I like to correct negative behavior right as it is happening. Therefore, offering praise every time I find the opportunity tends to offset all of the corrections I have to make on any given day. I try not to be critical but some days it is harder than others to find the good in all of the tantrums, fights and back talk.
Yesterday, I felt like all I did was repeat myself without results. Getting out the door in time for camp was a stretch and I felt exhausted by the time my butt his the car seat. I felt defeated and frustrated by all three of my kids. I was still a little uneasy from my encounter with Max's camp instructor from the day before. Her first interaction with him included his illustration of machine guns. Not the best first impression to make.
When I went to pick him up at the end of the morning session, I was a little anxious to hear how the day went. I know Max is a sweet, intelligent boy. But I also know his precocious nature and argumentative personality is not well received. I asked him how his day went and his sheepish smile immediately sent up red flags. I asked him if anything happened and he looked down telling me, "no."
I immediately jumped to the conclusion that his behavior wasn't up to par. I asked him to walk over to the teacher to sign him out. I braced myself for what she might say. I asked how the day went and she said, "Max is such a sweet boy."
Max's mouth turned up slightly with her compliment. She went on to tell me about his affinity for abstract thought and a conversation they had. She was so impressed by the way his mind was processing information in the context of a metaphor he shared. I felt so proud and so upset with myself at the same time. Here I was expecting bad news when all she had to offer was praise. It taught me to try to be more positive and to give my kids more credit than I do at times.
Don't assume the worst
I am definitely my kids' biggest fan. I like to cheer them on and take the approach of "catch them doing good." It can be so easy tp harp on all of the things they are doing wrong throughout the day because I like to correct negative behavior right as it is happening. Therefore, offering praise every time I find the opportunity tends to offset all of the corrections I have to make on any given day. I try not to be critical but some days it is harder than others to find the good in all of the tantrums, fights and back talk.
Yesterday, I felt like all I did was repeat myself without results. Getting out the door in time for camp was a stretch and I felt exhausted by the time my butt his the car seat. I felt defeated and frustrated by all three of my kids. I was still a little uneasy from my encounter with Max's camp instructor from the day before. Her first interaction with him included his illustration of machine guns. Not the best first impression to make.
When I went to pick him up at the end of the morning session, I was a little anxious to hear how the day went. I know Max is a sweet, intelligent boy. But I also know his precocious nature and argumentative personality is not well received. I asked him how his day went and his sheepish smile immediately sent up red flags. I asked him if anything happened and he looked down telling me, "no."
I immediately jumped to the conclusion that his behavior wasn't up to par. I asked him to walk over to the teacher to sign him out. I braced myself for what she might say. I asked how the day went and she said, "Max is such a sweet boy."
Max's mouth turned up slightly with her compliment. She went on to tell me about his affinity for abstract thought and a conversation they had. She was so impressed by the way his mind was processing information in the context of a metaphor he shared. I felt so proud and so upset with myself at the same time. Here I was expecting bad news when all she had to offer was praise. It taught me to try to be more positive and to give my kids more credit than I do at times.
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