Lesson #76

Break the rules sometimes

I have not always been a rule follower but I am one to set a lot of rules for my kids. Call me a hypocrite, but I like to think of it as learning from my mistakes. I think my kids do best with structure and it allows me to feel some sense of sanity to have rules. That being said, my personality definitely dictates my need for fun.

Over the weekend, we had a lot going on. In addition to my birthday, soccer and a get together celebration at a friend's house, we had a lot of good family time. It was definitely a departure from the usual structure and schedule.

Looking back on all of the fun we had, I think the best parts were the times that we were breaking some rules. We ate birthday cake immediately before dinner on Saturday and none of the kids saw a bathtub in over 48 hours. We watched the World Cup game from lawn chairs submerged in the swimming pool and I am pretty sure none of the kids brushed their teeth on Sunday.

Today is Monday and nobody seems to be suffering any fallout from the rule breaking. We are back on track with the routine of the summer and trying to be good little rule followers. I am sure we will be breaking all of the rules again soon!

Lesson #75

There is no cure for boy fever!

I knew pretty early on that Zoey was going to be a girlie girl. She loves to dress up, have her hair and makeup done and is all about being a princess. Despite her love for all things frilly and fancy, there is one thing she loves above anything girlie. This little lady loves her boys!

Zoey has more than one crush and she isn't afraid to show it. Cheering for her "lovey" as he plays soccer, Zoey is proud to show her affection. She talks non-stop about getting married and how her name will change depending on which boy she chooses. This girl does not know the definition of hard to get.

Yesterday as we were driving home from watching her brother's soccer game, Zo really threw me for a loop. After meeting a new boy and running around for an hour together, she was smitten. Out of nowhere, Zoey asks me, "I know lips are for kissing but what else?"

How do you even answer that question? I was of course able to list a number of other uses for lips but I was more concerned about the fact that she was thinking of kissing as the primary function of lips! Ugh! We have a long road ahead. Still nine years away from becoming a teenager, I am really going to nee to get creative in finding ways to extinguish this boy fever!

Lesson #74

Don't trust a two-year-old with a secret

This summer has really taken a toll on me and it is only July! Yesterday was my birthday and it fell at the end of a very long and exhausting week. With each day that went by, I found myself dragging into the next. I was really looking forward to the weekend and a fun night out with friends to celebrate. I decided to cash in my Mother's Day gift of a morning at the spa. I arrived at 8:00 am and was subjected to four solid hours of total pampering and relaxation. I might have to say it was four of the best hours of my life!

I met up with Josh and the kids after for a birthday lunch. I was so relaxed and happy to see them all. Miles came running toward me with a big smile. The first words out of his mouth were, "Mama. We made you a birthday cake."

There went the big surprise! (Josh had taken the kids shopping for the ingredients and let them pick out their own frosting color. They all worked together to make the cake, even busing out the Kitchen Aid! This was a first for Josh despite the fact that we got it as a wedding gift ten years ago.)

I tried to ignore the comment from Miles, not wanting the other kids to know he had leaked the big surprise. He just kept repeating it! Max and Zoey tried to distract me by telling me that they made something out of bacon. That must be what Miles is talking about.

In addition to the sweet birthday cake, they all worked together to make a banner and decorations.

All in all, it ended up being the best ruined surprise I have ever received.

Lesson #73

They might be ungrateful but at least they are generous

Over the past several months, I have really been struggling with how to raise grateful children. I feel like my oldest two are really at the age where they can understand the concept yet seem to be missing it. I don't feel like they are spoiled but they still possess a certain sense of entitlement when it comes to getting what they want.

This week, Max decided he wanted to use some of his money that he earned folding his laundry and cleaning his room. He looked up a variety of Nerf guns and picked one he really wanted. After an excruciating 48 hours, the toy arrived. Unfortunately, it failed to impress. The defective dart shooter ended up causing an equal amount of frustration for my six-year-old and myself. We decided to send it back. I gave Max the option of ordering something else and waiting or going to Target the next day and picking from what they had. He of course could not tolerate the thought of 48 more hours so we decided on Target. He had already looked up a few options and was counting out $16.44 to pay for the toy. In addition, he counted out another $16.44 for his brother. I was floored! He wanted Miles to have a gun also but knows he is not old enough to earn his own money. I assured Max that I could cover the cost of his brother's Nerf gun so that he could keep saving his money. Max was nothing short of insistent. I didn't have the heart to use his money so I put the additional funds aside to give back down the road.

I'm not giving up on my quest to raise grateful children. It is something I know that I will have to work hard to do. But generosity is right up there on my list of must have qualities. At least I know I am on the right road with this one!

Lesson #72

It is hard to stay angry at a two-year-old for long

Miles is really good at pushing my buttons. For a two-year-old, he is learning pretty quickly to test every limit. Our latest challenge is the transition from crib to toddler bed. We probably should have abandoned the crib months ago but I was grasping to every inch of control I still had over my youngest. He is in every sense of the word, a daredevil. This kid is scared of nothing and is a terrible rule follower. Once he started climbing out of his crib, I knew that it was all over.

We just made the switch last night. After two nights in a row of him getting up at 4:30, roaming the halls unsupervised, I knew we had to surrender. I am still working on how to convince him not to get out of his bed. In the mean time, it is a lot of walking him back to bad, making him promise he will not get out again.

After two returns at the start of nap time today, I found this child standing on the stairs with a mischievous smile, stretching out a slinky. He looked at me with a sheepish grin as I told him he could not get up again. "Okay," he said as he walked back up the stairs.

As hard as I try to be furious, I have to hide my smile at how cute he is. And lucky for him he is so cute. I might have given him away months ago!

Lesson #71

They really do grow up too fast

This summer has tested me in a lot of ways. In addition to juggling summer camps, sports, swimming lessons, play dates and vacations, I am trying to allow for plenty of free play for the kids. They all get a little stir crazy if we have too much time at hoe so I try hard to balance that all out. But the hectic nature of the summer coupled with more together time than they kids are accustomed to, has resulted in many a stressful day for me. In all honesty, a day doesn't go by that I fantasize about the first week of school for Max and Zoey this fall.

Yesterday, I took the kids to a favorite local kids museum. This place is a lot of fun for them but often very hard for me. There are certain areas for toddlers and other areas that are for bigger kids. This makes it challenging to please them all at once and to be safe, keeping everyone in sight. I took Zoey and Max over to the big bounce house and was praying I could keep Miles entertained long enough for the older two to have their fun. Miles ran over to the height chart and insisted on checking his growth since our last visit. To my surprise, this little toddler was exactly the right height to go in the big kid bounce house. He was so excited! The woman working there tried to warn me to have him wait until a few of the older kids got out. Clearly she does not know my son. There was no stopping him and he definitely held his own.

I was so excited at the new freedom we all had at the museum. But when I got home and was telling Josh about it, I felt a little sad. Thinking about Miles not being a little toddler anymore is definitely a hard pill to swallow. I know this is our last child and thinking about these kids all being out of the house definitely fills me with a sense of emptiness. It was just another reminder that I really need to focus hard on the moments of happiness and fun that we are all sharing this summer rather than letting a rough morning take over my mood for the day.

Lesson #70

The soothing quality of a storm is lost on a toddler

I can remember back to a time when a rain storm meant a perfect excuse to sleep in late or call in sick to work. When you are a stay at home mom, that is never an option. Now, instead of snuggling up in bed, listening to the calming sounds of thunder and rain, I get tortured by my kids.



After a long holiday weekend, I was really looking forward to a good night of sleep. That is not what happened. Looking to assert his independence, Miles decided to repeatedly climb out of his crib last night. I am pretty sure it all started with the storm. Something clearly woke him up. All I know is that this child popped out of his room and into the upstairs hallway a half dozen times between 1:15 and 2:30 in the morning. If that wasn't bad enough, Max waltzed in to announce he had an accident at 3:00. Once he realized it was storming, he did not want to go back to bed. Thirty minutes of visits to my room only prolonged my awake time. Fast forward to 5:00 am and Miles was out of bed again, ready to start the day. Ugh!!!! All I can do now is relish the fact that there is no more rain in the forecast until this weekend.